The X-factor

The most important thing in life is to learn how to love, and to let it in. - Morrie Schwartz

An individual does not have enough fingers and toes to count all of the theoretical approaches to psychotherapy. Psychoanalysis, Family Systems Therapy, Person Centered Counseling, Reality Therapy, and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, are the names of just a few.

Many of the approaches to therapy and counseling contradict each other in theory and practice, yet all enjoy some degree of efficacy and support.

What analysis is all about is for one hour a week, you sit and hope that for a flash of a moment you will experience connectedness.
-Marion Woodman

Irvin D. Yalom, M.D., one of the fathers of existential therapy, and the author of Love's Executioner, asked how can competing approaches to counseling all work? What factor do they have in common?

Yalom answers his own question. He believes that healing takes place, in all of the theoretical approaches, when a person admits their deepest fears and secrets to another human being … and still feels accepted and valued.

But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners. – Matthew 9:13

There are so many places in scripture where Jesus talks about reaching out to each other. We all need to be listened to. We all need compassion. We all need to be able to tell our stories, not be judged, and to feel loved.

We are the conduits of what Jesus came to Earth to offer humanity: love, mercy, and forgiveness.

... Father, we thank you for being a God of second chances. Father, forgive us for not listening to each other. Father, turn our hearts and teach us to love the way that you love. In Jesus name we pray ...

Fight plan

Every fighter has a plan, until they get hit in the mouth.

- Mike Tyson

The Christian life is not a playground but a battlefield.

- Billy Graham

Our faith is played out in our relationships. We talk about having a personal relationship with God, but that relationship never takes place in a vacuum. It is never just God and us alone ... never. People populate our stories as they unfold.

Life can throw some mighty wicked punches, the kind of punches that can be heard from across the street and bounce a person off the pavement. Sometimes these punches come from strangers. More often they come from people we love.

Life is hard. What do we do when the script we have written for our lives becomes a lie? What do we do when we are forced to reexamine everything we thought to be true?

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. - Philippians 4:13

God’s promises are not empty. He has a fight plan we can cling to when the world no longer makes sense. --We focus on mercy. We focus on repentance. We focus on forgiveness. -- In our relationships, we stand back up on faith ready for whatever comes next, focused on love personified, the precious blood of Jesus Christ.

Flying Bibles

Sunday I was hustling from the sanctuary of our church to an older building across the street for a men’s Bible study. A handful of friends, the kind of people one would expect to see in a pool hall rather than a place of worship Sunday morning, were waiting for me. My people.

The Pastor of our Church, Tom Nelson, saw me hurrying and mentioned on the fly that he would be quoting me in that morning’s message. Boy, my head started to swell almost immediately, pride, it was there. I can’t deny it.

But, our God has a sense of humor, trust me.

I took about ten steps, strutting probably, caught the tip of my toe on the curb ... and in slow motion ... tripped.

The stack of bibles I was carrying jumped out of my hands, flapping in the wind like a flock of birds taking off into the air. In the meantime, I continued earthward until the side of my face bounced of the sidewalk, twice.

Proverbs 3:12 says that the LORD disciplines those He loves. I was feeling God’s love in full measure as I lay stretched out on the sidewalk.

It was not hard to laugh off what had just happened as I picked myself up. I have had a lot of opportunity to do foolish things over the years. But, the God who loves me always gives me a second chance. Even when, maybe especially when, the things I did, the people I hurt, and how I hurt them, was not so funny.

If there is something for which you need forgiveness, ask Him. He will forgive you. That is not my promise, that is His promise. Our God is dynamic, He has a sense of humor, but above all else He is a God of mercy and love. He loves you.

... Father, thank you for being our God, thank you for the people in our lives, and thank you for loving us. Father, humble us when we need to be humbled, and always bring us back to your mercy and grace. In Jesus name we pray ...